Episode 11 - Submission

Dr. Goodvibes contains strong language, adult themes, and depictions of high impact sex and or violence. This podcast is recommended for mature audiences. Listener discretion is advised.

Katie: Hey Gemma. 

Gemma: Katie, take a seat. 

Katie: Okay.

So 

Gemma: So? 

Katie: I don't know what that expression means. 

Gemma: Let me dispel the mystery.

Katie: It, is that? Holy hell. 

Gemma: Yeah. You're a hit! I feel like a hit doesn't even cover it. No, not really. Dr. Bad Vibes is doing numbers. I know it's only a special preview pilot, but god damn! We've never seen pre subscription and survey results like this. You're going straight to series. Really? Twelve episodes, on the air, and management has signed off on 250 percent of the standard new show marketing budget.

We're talking bus ads. Bus stop ads. Train ads. National. If you commute, you're gonna know about this show. I Okay. Okay. You're damn right it's okay. Now, let's talk brass tacks. You want to keep Noah as your primary producer? Uh, yeah. 

Katie: Yeah, sure. Yeah, he's doing good work. 

Gemma: Great. You've got budget for two more producers, or four researchers.

One and two, however you want to break it up. But have names on my desk by the end of the week. 

Katie: Wow. All right. Yeah. Eh. This is happening. 

Gemma: I guess you got lucky that Hal actually murdered that girl, hey? 

Katie: Yeah. Yeah, I suppose that's true. 

Gemma: Katie? 

Katie: Yeah? 

Gemma: Go! I want you back in the studio today! 

Katie: Oh, right, okay, uh, okay, okay, uh, do I need to, uh, 

Gemma: Bus stops!

Katie: Right, right! Yes!

Peter: It's ready. 

Kimmy: Good. 

Peter: He's barely even tried to say a word in two weeks. What makes you think he'll start now? 

Kimmy: If he knows it's his last day on earth, he might find his voice. Talking's what he does for a living after all.

 (Water splashing, muffled screams) 

Kimmy: Take the gag out. 

Peter: Hold still.

Kimmy: Harry.

You are going to die today. Do you understand that? This cathartic exercise has run its course. We're expected home this week, which means that our time together here is over. 

Hal: Mrs. Amal. 

Peter: She's still talking. 

Kimmy: Look who found his voice. 

Peter: Just in time. Good. 

Kimmy: I hope No. 

No, I don't feel the need to share my hopes with you.

I hoped that my daughter would be found alive. I hoped that my family would be made whole again. Then finally, I hoped that my daughter's killer would be brought to justice. And you, you have stolen my hopes from me, over and over. 

Peter: Kimmy? 

Kimmy: No, I'm okay.

No. Today, today I take everything from you. And I We Take back everything that you took from us.

Okay, go ahead.

Peter: Harry? 

Hal: Yeah? 

Peter: How's the hand? 

Hal: I don't really 

 (Crunching) 

Hal: AHH! Oh! 

Peter: Broken I think. 

Hal: Yep, seems that way. 

Peter: I'm gonna offer you a gift Harry. 

Hal: Why? 

 (Crunching) 

Hal: Aargh! Oh fuck, fuck, fuck.

Peter: We're not doing clarifying questions Harry. I only wanna hear yes or no. Do you understand? 

Hal: Yes.

Peter: Okay then, let me tell you about the gift. Now we could potentially spend a few more days here. Say we had car trouble, hit a deer or something. Really take our time. Considering everything that you did to us, that you took from us, we've talked it over. Huh? And we can find the motivation, the drive, to stretch this out just a little longer.

Or, you could show us how sorry you are. Show us that you have found some genuine regret in your heart for what you did to our family. And we, I think, could make the next bit quick at least. It seems like even a sick fuck like you might appreciate the value of that after this long. So all you have to do is when I turn on this recorder here, say your name, how sorry you are that you killed Ruby and that you can no longer live with the guilt. 

And they'll find this in a motel room near the Mexican border along with your belongings. Although nobody is ever going to find you. All you have to do is say you're sorry. And this can be all over. What do you say?

This is a limited time offer, Harry. 

Kimmy: We've waited this long, Harry. I would hope after the month we've spent together you understand that this can go on for as long as it needs to. Yes or no? 

Hal: Yes. Turn the recorder on. I'll give you what you want. 

Peter: Good.

Hal: Wait. 

Peter: What?

Hal: Sorry. Can I um, Can I have some water? I assume you don't want this to sound like I've recently been gagged. 

Kimmy: Fine. 

Peter: I'll go.

Hal: How's it going? 

Kimmy: You shut the fuck up, Harry. Or I'll cut your balls off. 

Hal: Sorry. Sorry.

Kimmy: You seem better. I was starting to think we'd broken your brain. 

Hal: Yeah, I thought you had too. 

Kimmy: I'm glad. I want you to feel this. 

Hal: Happy to help.

 (Drinking) 

Peter: That's enough. 

Hal: Thanks. 

Peter: Youre....

 (Thwack!) 

Hal: Ow. 

Peter: Stop fucking around.

Hal: Peter, Kim, Peter and Kim Amal. 

Kimmy: We are absolutely not on a first name basis. 

Peter: Fucking hell. Now I have to delete it. 

Hal: No, sorry, I'm not trying anything. Just gimme a second to warm up my voice. 

Kimmy: Why? 

Hal: Do you want this to be credible or not? Your whole plan falls apart if they don't believe I really fled the authorities and killed myself somewhere in the desert.

I met those FBI agents. They'll know if it sounds fake or forced. And who do you think they're gonna come after first? I don't know how thorough you were in your cover up, but there's gonna be a traffic camera or something out there where one of you can be seen behind the wheel of my car. Your only chance of actually getting away with this is a believable suicide note. God knows I can't write one anymore.

You can delete the recording, but I need to talk for a bit. Make it so my voice sounds at least close to normal. 

Peter: Fine. 

Kimmy: What are you waiting for? Talk. 

Hal: You know, I'm surprised. Not a lot of people have the fortitude to torture someone like this over such an extended period of time. I know professionals who would have long given up by now.

Kimmy: You talk. This is not a fucking conversation. 

Peter: Really not looking for your feedback here. 

Kimmy: Just do some fucking tongue twisters and hurry the fuck up. 

Hal: I'm serious. Clearly what happened has hardened you. Turned you into the kind of person who can slice someone's nipple in half with nail scissors. Go have a meal. And then come back for more. 

Peter: That's it! I've had it! 

I'm gonna fucking kill him! 

Kimmy: Peter, what if he's right? What about the Feds? 

Peter: Fuck the Feds. We'll fucking risk it. He's probably full of shit anyway. If anyone was looking for him, seriously, they would have found him by now. Nobody's looking for you. Nobody!

Kimmy ththe feds are fucking useless!They didn't act on their tip for six months, and they didn't even arrest him when they did. He was never gonna, there was never going to be any justice. He got away with it for 15 years and there was no way that was going to change now. 

Kimmy: Peter. 

Peter: He has to die, Kimmy. We've come too far. 

Kimmy: Yeah, yes, I know. But he has to understand what he put Ruby through, right to the end. 

Hal: Hey, I know it's hard. It's hard to hurt someone, even if you feel that you are better than them. Righteous in doing so. 

Kimmy: This is righteous. You killed our daughter. 

Hal: No, I didn't. 

Kimmy: Not this shit again. 

Peter: We don't fucking believe you!

Kimmy: Mick told us what you did. He told us how you did it. He told us everything. Every single fucking detail. We've listened to your show. You grew up to give people advice on how to be like you. You're a sick, sick man. And you were a sick, sick child. And you killed our daughter. Not just killed, destroyed. We had to look at her to see what you did.

God, barely even recognized her. 

Peter: You took a child and you indulge your sick fucking fantasies on her. That, that's unforgivable. 

Hal: Yes, it is. But have I once asked you to forgive me? 

Kimmy: No! Because you're clearly a sociopath. To get on your fucking podcast every week and spout your bullshit about safe and healthy bondage after you choked a girl to death for pleasure?

How many others, Harry? How many Rubies have you murdered over the years? 

Hal: You clearly know about Alana. Who told you what happened between me and her? Who gave you the information that you fed to whoever it was that called my show? 

Peter: He said that he read your journals. He remembered enough of the detail that it could be used against you.

Hal: Okay. 

Peter: What? 

Hal: Sorry, I'm just Weirdly I'm actually relieved that Alana didn't hate me enough to get involved in this. What the fuck? No. No, I know it's not It's not relevant, I just I didn't keep journals. Diaries, anything like that. So what? You're saying he's lying? Well, no, not about the specifics of my breakup or my relationship, but he didn't get them from journals.

He must have been watching, listening, oh, Jesus, he must have

Mr. Amal, Mrs. Amal, this is not Mick is playing you. I don't, I don't know why Now, but he clearly wants you to I don't know, punish me. Wait, does he Does he know about this? Does he know that you're planning to kill me? 

Kimmy: He doesn't know what's happening today. 

Peter: We don't fucking chat. 

Kimmy: This. This is happening because we didn't trust the FBI to do the right thing.

Even after we softened you up. Even after we made you pull out all your skeletons. Live and on the fucking air. 

Peter: We waited. We waited for justice that never came. Again. We saw that you were brought in and then we saw that you were out again the same fucking day. 

Kimmy: You don't know what it's like. To see. 

Hal: I promise you two, this is a mistake.

This is not justice. Mick is using you. He's using you and he's using me. I didn't kill Ruby. I thought the same thing everyone else did. That she was just missing. That then she'd been killed by that, that serial killer. I didn't know what Mick was. Not until it was too late. Not until he killed the, the other woman.

Kimmy: No. You're trying to trick us. 

Hal: I'm not. I swear to you, I I haven't I don't know how this all fits together, but I know that I had nothing to do with Ruby's death. She was a kid. I didn't know her. I didn't You know how guilty I feel about Alana because you used it against me, and all she did was dump me.

That is not who I am. I'm not on the air every week trying to make violence sexy. I'm trying to stop people from hurting one another. 

Kimmy: Because you killed someone. 

Hal: No, because I hurt someone I loved. Because I lost someone I loved. Because I didn't know what I was doing. And that guilt drove me crazy. It took me years before No.

No, Kim. Peter. Please, I I know deep down that you want a clean answer. You want a chance. Yes. For revenge. But you've got the wrong guy. 

Kimmy: No, your brother told us what you really are. 

Hal: Whatever Mick told you is a lie. And if you follow through with this, you'll never be the same. This can still be okay. You don't have to do this.

Why did you text me that? The thing about wanting to be shown the depths of my depravity. You The text that got me here. 

Peter: He Your brother said if we said that, that you'd come running. 

Kimmy: Because you're a pervert.

 (Bitter laughter) 

Kimmy: What? What's funny? 

Hal: Sure. That's true. But that's not why. The last time I saw Ruby, that's what she said to me. She

She somehow knew what I was. What I was into. Which I suppose she heard from Mick, now that I think about it. After Alana and I broke up, she came to me and she said How fucking dare you! She was a child! No, no. Nothing happened. Because you're right, she was a child. I didn't think she had any idea what she was talking about.

So I told her to take a hike, go and play Nintendo or something. I swear nothing happened. I never entertained it. I never touched her. I certainly didn't kill her. She was a kid.

Peter: Kim? 

Kimmy: No, he's lying. 

Hal: I'm not. 

Kimmy: Shut the fuck up! I need to think. I need

Peter: Kim, wait! 

Kimmy: What? 

Peter: I don't I don't 

Hal: I remember. You got arrested, right? I The day they charged Mick? 

Peter: Yeah. 

Hal: Yeah, I did. There's no sheriffs, no bailiffs here to stop you from killing me, Mr. Amal. But you've got the wrong guy. I'm not the one you should be angry with. And there's no ease or tranquility that can be extricated from my corpse.

Not for either of you. Fifteen years is a long time. I'm sure you'd both do anything at this point to try and stop the hurt. But if I'm responsible in any way for what happened, even tangentially, you have your pound of flesh and fingernails. I'll play proxy for him, if that's what you need, but if you kill me, If you bury my body in five different fields, and they think I ran, then you will have taken an innocent man's life and given it to the man who actually killed Ruby.

Kimmy: I No. I have to make a phone call. 

Peter: Kimmy?

Katie: Noah! 

Noah: Hey, Katie. 

Katie: Where have you been? I've been messaging you. I have news. It's all right. 

Noah: Okay. Yeah, sorry. I was just -

Katie: Doesn't fucking matter. Doesn't matter. We're a hit. We are a fucking monster hit. We're gonna be a series, and you're gonna be a producer, and isn't that fucking incredible? 

Noah: I think -

Katie: Of course it is.

Okay, so we need to basically start over on the two and three assemblies that I did myself, but But that's alright. We're getting two more producers, so if you have anyone in mind, then 

What? What is that face? 

Noah: I, um, I listened to the first episode. 

Katie: Yeah. Oh. 

Noah: And the assemblies, all the sound libraries that you sent through, went through the notes that you put up on the shared drive.

Katie: Okay. 

Noah: You bugged Hal's phone? 

Katie: No, I didn't bug Hal's phone. 

Noah: But you have, you were recording his calls to his mom, to Mrs. Sims, to you! He was asking me about the interview recording app, he thought it was broken. 

Katie: No, it wasn't broken. I used my producer credentials to remotely activate it in a totally normal way.

Noah: So why didn't he get the approval notification? 

Katie: Why didn't he get what? 

Noah: The approval notification. If it's remotely activated, he should have to confirm it. 

Katie: I don't know, that's, that's really weird. 

Noah: I heard, from one of the other producers, that if you refresh the connection, While logged out, then logged back in, it just sends a blank notification and automatically starts recording.

Katie: Wow, that's, yeah, that'd be weird. I hadn't heard about that. Seems like a pretty big oversight, they should probably fix it. 

Noah: Katie 

Katie: What? 

Noah: It was bad enough that you cherry picked those callers to try and bait him. And then making up fake quickies? Shoot, I even thought that was kind of clever, but this is 

Katie, this is really bad.

Katie: Oh, come on, Noah, we talked about this. I, I was just curious. I wasn't gonna do anything with the recordings, but I had to know. For me, what was going on. I googled Ruby Amal before we were even done editing that first call with the fake Alana. Huh. He'd been hiding that for years. And why? For what? 

Noah: No, I get it. Truly, I do. I just, 

I do not think I can do this show with you. 

Katie: He's a fucking murderer, Noah. He killed a girl. Fled the country. When are you going to get over this crush? 

What? What's with the face? 

Noah: I've been offered a job as second producer on Topes Loose. So I think I'm going to take it. 

Katie: Oh, come on. 

Noah: Thank you for the opportunity, but I don't think this is a good fit for me.

Katie: Right. That all? 

Noah: Yeah. 

Katie: Okay. Great, uh, I've gotta get back to this, so 

Noah: Okay.

Hal: Okay.

Hey guys. 

Kimmy: Shut up.

Peter: It's time. Start talking. 

Hal: I -

Peter: Don't make me hit you again. 

Hal: Okay. Okay.

My name is Hal Kitchener. I can no longer live with what I've done. And I have decided to take my own My own life. The guilt No, you know what? Fuck this! I didn't kill Ruby Amal, 

I didn't frame my brother, And I didn't run from the motherfucking FBI! Peter and Kimmy Amal have kept me prisoner! 

Peter: Say it! Say you fucking did it!

Hal: I didn't do it! 

Kimmy: You're a liar! You're a fucking liar!

 (Punching, grunting) 

Kimmy: Fuck it. Destroy the recorder. I'm done with this. We're done with you. 

How, how can you try to lie to us after this long? How can you? 

 (knocking) 

Hal: Help! 

Police: This is the police. Is there anyone in there? 

Peter & Kimmy: Shit. 

Hal: Kim, Peter, it's not too late. We can still fix this. 

Kimmy: Shut the fuck up.

Police: We're entering the premises. If there is anyone inside, come out slowly with your hands up. 

Kimmy: Just finish him off. 

Peter: What? 

Hal: You don't have to do this. 

Police: Hello? Kitchen's clear. 

Living room clear. Check the garage. 

Kimmy: Here. 

Peter: Kimmy, it's too late! 

Kimmy: Fuck it, I'll do it myself! 

 (Slashing) 

Police: get your hands up! 

Drop that knife, right now! Get on the ground!

We need an EMT in here!

Next time, on Dr. Good Vibes. 

Milton: We're just gonna let him go? 

Callaway: Looks like it. Just the way it goes sometimes. 

Milton: This is fucking ridiculous. 

Callaway: Go get the car. 

Dr. Goodvibes is a Neon Diner production. Written, produced, and directed by Richard P. Doyle. Editing and sound design by Ramon Samson. It features the vocal talents of Richard P. Doyle, Rachel Slee, Jonah Marinan, Alex Gonzalez, Louis Dylan Savage, Aaron Landy, Nat Jensen, Jeff Kortner, Lily Doyle. Full credits can be found in the show notes. 

Dr. Good Vibes is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. you So please subscribe to ensure you never miss an episode.